Tuesday, January 31, 2006

liveblogging the State of the Union

(Even though I'm still wicked pissed that this is taking away my SVU.) :(

First, this:

They say that the use of certain words can very much manipulate those. Look at these numbers of mentions of the following words in his speech.

Freedom/Liberty: 23
Terror/Terrorist: 17
Enemy: 10
Security: 10
WMD and related (nuclear/"nukular" weapons): 5
Evil: 3
Tyranny: 2
9/11: 2
Osama bin Laden: 1
New Orleans: 1


The Speech:

9:01pm: Laura Bush is flanked by a woman with a hijab and a black man. Damn. Strategic token placement much?

9:02pm: Four SCOTUS justices are there. Clarence Thomas, whom I loathe. And Alito, who just got confirmed today. *tear* And John Roberts. Ugh. Packing the seats with blind supporters much? And Justice Bryer, who isn't so bad.

9:08: Le Shrub enters to thunderous applause. Bleh.

9:09: News during his ascension to the lecter that Cindy Sheehan, who was supposed to be the distinguished guest of a Congresswoman, was arrested on Capitol Hill....Yeah, Cindy Sheehan. :)

9:12: Applause FINALLY ends.

9:12: Starts with mourning of Coretta Scott King, who is now "reunited" with her husband. Way to not acknowledge her own achievements, asshole. Because she's only as good as her husband (MLK), of course.

9:13: Even tough debates must be in a civil way, must respect one another, blahdeblah silencing political dissent blahdeblah. "The state of our union is strong," my ass.

9:16: We will act boldly in freedom's cause, bring democracy to those poor people elsewhere.

9:17: Women vote in Afghanistan! Wow! Obviously they're completely liberated!

9:18: Al Qaeda is endangering America! The terrorists are evil! We must fight!!!
("We love our freedom, and we will fight to keep it.")
There is no peace/honour in retreat --> we can't leave! Duh!

9:20 Standing ovation number five hundred sixty two. I hate politicians.

9:21: We have a clear plan for victory in Iraq. Building gov't, reconstruction efforts, building economy, blah blah. They're our allies! Those people who kill us are just silly. Most Iraqis love us! I am confident in our will for victory.

9:22: We are winning! (yeah, ok. winning, my ass.)

9:23: Politicians in DC won't decide when our troops come home.
Holy subverting the separation of powers, Batman.

9:24: Responsible criticism and defeatism that acknowledges failure. Second-guessing is not a strategy.
Because that right there doesn't silence dissent. Not at all.
bin Laden will come to power if we leave Iraq!!!

9:26: Tokenizing a dead American soldier. Family is sitting behind good ol' Laura. *sigh* Worst commander in chief ever. This family shouldn't be at the state of the union, because their son/brother should not have fucking died.

9:29: I think he just said that he expects Hamas to "work for everlasting peace." What the fuck is he smoking?
Oh, and we've fixed so many countries in the Middle East!!! Look how many have had elections! Wooooo democracy!

9:30: First mention of Iran.

9:31: Isolationism is bad, reiteration number 7425l.

9:32: Look, I'm pretending that I care about real AIDS efforts and educating girls/women's rights.

9:33: There it is.
"Reauthorize the PATRIOT Act!" Because it'll help them fight drug trafficking and crime. (???)

9:34: Defending wiretaps/ "Terrorist surveillance program" bullshit. Other presidents did it!!! If we don't, we'll just sit back and wait to be hit again. (Like 9/11)
(9:35: cut to Hillary Clinton, looking incredulous at his audacity.)

9:37: Our economy is healthy. Really! I swear!

9:38: He actually said immigrants are vital to the economy, and valuable. A standing ovation, very slow in coming, but a standing ovation nonetheless.
I gotta admit: I'm impressed.

9:42: He tried to make a joke that both he and Clinton - his dad's two favourite people - turned 60 this year.
Cut to Hillary Clinton smiling indulgently, thinking, "What the fuck? You're not funny, douchebag."

9:44: Free trade = good! Open markets! It'll be good for American workers! (Except the ones that lose their jobs to cheaper producers overseas. And except for the workers in shitty working conditions and who get fucked over by free trade. You know, whatever.)

9:45: A new immigration system must enhance economy. Because that's all immigrants are good for. Duh.
"Keeping America competitive" reiteration number 84209.

9:46: Wider use of medical records to help control costs. Um. Invasion of privacy much?

9:47: Women in lots and lots of counties have no OBGYNs. Aw, he acts like he cares.
Women in most counties have no access to EC or abortion. Do we care about that? No.

9:48: America is addicted to oil. (Much talked-about line.) Instead, we'll use nuclear ("nukular") energy! It's clean and safe! Really!

9:50: American Competitiveness Initiative. Ooh education for our kids so that we can continue to produce smart people who make America great. Like you care.

9:52: No Child Left Behind Act is working. Really.

9:53: There are fewer abortions in America than any point in two decades.
This is a good thing.
It's not 'cause people don't have access, of course.
It's a "gain."
A matter of "conscience."
Abstinence support has made a difference in our country's morality.

9:55: Worried about the health of our most sacred institutions...activist courts that try to re-define marriage...America's not in decline though. We'll "prove the pessimists wrong" again.
What does that mean???

The Americans deserve courts that deliver equal justice under the law. Shoutout to Alito and Roberts.
Oh ew they just got standing ovations.

9:56: Judges must be servants of the law, not legislate from the bench.
Yeah right. Because that's not what Alito's going to do or anything.
Acting like he likes Sandra Day O'Connor. "The US is grateful to S.D.O'C."

9:57: Cloning is bad, stem cell research is bad, embryo research is bad.
"Human life is a gift from our creator and that life should never be...discarded or put up for sale."

10:00: Job skills that bring upward mobility.
'Cause that's all it needs.
Right. As long as you've got the opportunity, you'll achieve the American Dream. That's all it takes.

10:02: Invokes the memory of Lincoln's Emancipation Proclamation, MLK, etc.
History is written in courage. We'll show that courage, and we'll finish well. Blahdeblah.


Other Notes:
I don't think I've ever seen this many standing ovations in my life. I would hate to be in that audience and expected to stand up every two seconds. I'd rather shoot myself in the foot. Really sucks for the Repubs. Their poor knees.


Items thrown at TV:
-stuffed moose
(Could've been much worse.)

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

And this is why I like your blog-"items thrown at TV". It's a nice, measurable indicator of rage.zukwg